Forgiveness, and a Final Goodbye
by The Iron Tinker Boy
Summary: The old saying is, "If you love someone, set them free, and if they love you, they'll come back to you." But, can James lose Vesper - the woman he loves more than anything - a second time? Post Casino Royale FanFic, written in James' POV.


I open my eyes to a dark room. I can't make much of anything out, but there's a sense of familiarity to it. I can't figure out why...

I sit there for a moment, my senses on high alert, as I look around. I can hear the faint sound of footsteps in the distance, and it seems as though they're moving closer to me.

Soon, there's a tall, petite, shadowed figure making its way towards me. Somehow, I don't feel threatened. I only sit there, calmly looking up at the figure.

As it approaches me, I can finally make out a face. It was a woman. Perfect cheekbones, beautiful greyish eyes, perfectly shaped lips, her long dark brown hair sitting beautifully atop her head, soft curls resting upon her shoulders. She wore a beautiful purple dress, that outlined every curve to her figure, perfectly. Somehow it again seemed all too familiar. Though, I was certain of one thing... Her beauty was almost angelic.

She kneels in front of me, her beautiful, soft, grey eyes looking into my own cold, blue ones. At this simple gesture, I realize who she is...

Vesper Lynd.

The woman I once loved... The woman who betrayed me... The woman I could've saved, if I'd just been more careful... Most importantly, the woman I will always love...

I'm snapped out of my thoughts, as her soft, delicate hand cups my cheek, gently stroking it with her thumb.

She hasn't said anything yet, and at this gesture, I realize how I long to hear her voice again...

"Vesper..." I manage, faintly, though I'm rewarded with a gentle smile, and I manage a faint one in return.

"James..." She says in return, her voice in a whisper.

I give into temptation, and press my lips to hers, ever so carefully. My hand involuntarily cups her cheek, and she slips both hands down along my neck, stopping at the back of my neck, which she strokes softly. How I've missed this... 'She still tastes nice', I think to myself, which makes me smile at the memory of that night, but I can't bring myself to pull away.

Reluctantly, she pulls away the slightest bit. I manage to control myself, and allow her to do so. I look up into her eyes, longingly.

"I've missed you so much..." She whispers to me. Its almost as though she can't bring herself to speak any louder.

"I've missed you, too, my love..." I whisper in return. Suddenly the realisation that she'd been killed many years ago, hits me, and I stumble over my words. "You... You were killed... Weren't you? I remember... Trying to save you, but it didn't work... I took your body in my arms, and wept... W-What happened?" My eyes water the slightest bit as I speak, at the painful memory.

"Yes, I was killed, James... This is the last time we'll ever speak again..." She whispers, though I can tell it hurts her to say this.

"I can't go without speaking to you ever again... There must be another-" She presses her finder to my lips, in order to silence me, and I immediately quiet down. I can't help but think I've done something wrong, but I know that's impossible. I haven't seen her in ages, I couldn't have done anything to upset her... I only wait for her explanation to come.

"James... I'm sorry for everything I've done. I only betrayed you, because..." She pauses for a moment, and I feel like her silence is killing me. "Because I wanted to help my boyfriend... I had no idea I was going to fall in love with you... If I could go back to those days, I'd change what I did to you, in a heartbeat... I'm sorry, James. All I want is your forgiveness."

At her words, I felt as though I'd been punched in the gut. She wants me to forgive her? As much as I love her... Can I really do it? I don't know what to do, and I find myself stumbling over my words yet again. I want to forgive her. Perhaps things can go back to the way they were before... I'd like that... Yes. That's what I want. I'm sure of it. But, I still find myself stumbling over my words, regardless.

"Yes... I-I forgive you..." As I say this, I look up at her, and I find her staring right back into my eyes. She seems to brighten the slightest bit at my words, and it feels absolutely amazing, seeing her this way, again, after so long.

"Thank you, James..." She whispers to me, and I can't help but manage a soft smile.

"You're welcome..." I nod as I speak, the small smile still playing upon my lips.

"I love you." She whispers to me. Its only now I realise how much I've missed this.

"I love you, too." I whisper in return, pulling her into my arms.

I feel her tilt her head to the side, the slightest bit, her lips near my ear.

"This is our final goodbye..." She whispers. I only frown, as I pull away from her.

"Final goodbye?" I repeat, realising I sound like a helpless child, but I don't care all too much.

"Yes." She says simply. I'm speechless for a moment, but she thankfully continues. "You see... I'm not really with you, right now, James." She bites her lip, as she looks into my eyes once more. "This is the only way I can speak to you, and it won't happen again..." She states softly, watching me. I only look into her eyes absolutely speechless. I have no idea what she means by this. She says she's not with me, but... I'm holding her right now... What could she possibly mean by that? Finally, I manage to speak, my eyes watering the slightest bit, once again. "But, why?" I lost her once, I'm certainly not keen on losing her again.

"I can't explain it, James. You'll understand eventually." She says softly. My eyes widen slightly at her words.

Eventually? Why can't she just tell me? Despite my frustration, I shake my head quickly.

"Please... I've lost you once, I can't lose you again, Vesper..." A stray tear rolls down my cheek, but I don't bother to wipe it away.

"Its out of my control." She states simply, before taking me in her arms.

I feel at peace here, but the pain of knowing this was the last time we'd see each other, is weighing on me. I sit in her arms in silence, before finally wrapping my arms around her in return. Because she's on her knees, she's taller than me, and she rests her chin on my head, which rests against her shoulder. She tilts her head down, pressing a kiss to the top of my head, whispering; "I love you, James." I don't have a chance to respond.

* * *

I jolt upright in my bed, at the sound of my alarm. It buzzes, on the night-table, but I ignore it as my eyes dart around the room for a moment. I jump off the bed, and slam my hand down over the snooze button of the clock, perhaps even breaking it, but I don't take the time to look.

In only my pants, I look around my flat for any sign of her. Not finding anything, I start to walk around.

"Vesper?" I call out, turning the corner, into the kitchen.

Nothing.

Suddenly, everything she said to me makes sense. I lean back against the wall behind me, tilting my head back with a heavy sigh.

"It was a dream..."


End file.
